Eggs

This is a simple recipe. It's easy, quick, cheap, etc. You just take a couple pieces of toasted bread on the first layer. Butter them up if you want. A slice of provolone cheese, two pieces of Salsalito Turkey and then just fried an egg and put it on top. The red spice on top is the Swutch spice. In the background is Raspberry Saft which you can buy at any Ikea.

Beer Pong

There are many different house rules and regulations when it comes to beer pong. Different countries use different words and even different table owners can make different rules. First of all, the table. A regulation beer pong table is 9 feet by 5 feet. (Mine is 8 feet by 4 feet because it's all we could fit in the car) You can get a nice, hard piece of plywood at any Home Depot like store. Maybe $25. Then you need 4 Beer mugs. You can go to www.northcoteimports.com for the beer mugs. Make sure you get the 1 Liter Oktoberfest style Masskrug. Then just buy some ping pong paddles and a net and you're set. Oh, and a ton of beer of course. The goal now is to obviously get the ball into the mug. If it hits the mug and does not go in, it is one sip. If it goes in, you must chug the beer. Needless to say, copious amounts of alcohol are consumed during a battle of beer pong.

Here are some critical verbiage you must know in order to look foolish which in beer pong is not looking foolish, if you know what I mean.

• Rim Sinker = When your opponent hits the rim of your mug and you react quickly enough to sink the ball directly into his mug. Probably the second most difficult sink in all of beer pong
• Swish = When you sink the ball directly into the beer in the mug without hitting any of the mug. This is the single most difficult sink in beer pong.
• Rim Job = Hit the rim of the mug, 3 sips for your opponent
• Mug Hit = Hit the side of the mug, 1 sip for your opponent
• Pong Dance = Not to be confused with pole dance. This is when you sink the ball in your opponents mug...you must celebrate.
  
• Bouncer = This is the most humiliating way to be sunk. Your opponent bounces the ball into your mug while you are not paying attention.
  

This would qualify as a rudimentary introduction into the world of Beer Pong, but it will suffice for the short term. The truest and surest way to learn would be to actually play a few rounds. Many pictures to come!

Bangers and Mash

Mmmmm, gravy!! I made a gravy/sauce a few nights ago that would make Homer Simpson go crazy. It was paired with some Bratwurst Sausages (Bangers) and mashed potatoes (Mash). I also made my typical light salad that went well with the richness of the mashed potatoes and to make sure everything went through cleanly, I added some baked beans. I almost licked the plate after this one, actually, I did lick the plate. Oh, and this meal would love some companionship and that company could be in a nice pint of Guinness, Heineken, Lowenbrau or just a diet Miller.

Mashed Potatoes (Mash):

• Put potatoes in a pot with 4-5 cloves of peeled garlic. Add some chicken bullion and any other spices you might want to add. Cover the potatoes with water and bring to a boil. When a fork can easily poke into the potato, it's done.
  
• Mash up the potatoes and garlic with some cream or milk and add salt and pepper to taste.
  

Gravy:

• I cooked some bacon in a pan and put that bacon in the salad. In that same pan, I then cooked the already boiled (in beer) bratwurst sausages. With the drippings from that, I added about half a pack of the Publix brand Onion gravy mix with about a cup of milk. I added my traditional spices (cayenne pepper, regular pepper, cajun seasoning, grill seasoning, etc). And you can add a touch of butter, depending how unhealthy you want to get.
  
• Is it good for you? No. If you ate it every day would you die from a heart attack at 40? Yes. But you can put this gravy on steaks, add some mushrooms and put it on chicken, you could even throw some apples in there and put it on pork chops. Anyway, this is soul food and anything good for your soul, must be good for your body.
  

Stir-Fried Shrimp with Spicy Orange Sauce

If you want a healthy meal that is spicy and has an Asian flair to it, try this one. I made it last night for my dear friends, the Hitchners, and they loved it. Well, they said they did anyway. I mean they didn't go running off to the balcony or a trash can. If you want, you can add to the decor and the overall loveliness of the meal by eating on a beer pong table like we did. Basically, just buy a 8 by 4 foot piece of strong plywood and put it on top of another table and you have a beer pong/dining room table. It really helps out with the overall atmosphere and ambiance.

Anyway, here are the ingredients:

• Shrimp, bigger the better
• Cornstarch
  
• 1/2 cup of Orange Juice, maybe a bit more
• 3 tblspns soy sauce
• 2 tblspns honey
• 2 tblspns rice wine vinegar
• 1 1/2 tblspns chile paste with garlic (sambal oelek)
• Canola Oil
• 2 tlbnspn minced fresh ginger
• 4 garlic gloves
• 1/2 cup chopped green onions

• Sprinkle the shrimp with the cornstarch and toss well to coat, but only a thin coating
• Combine the juice, soy sauce, honey, vinegar, and chile past in a bowl and whisk thoroughly. The recipe doesn't call for Cayenne pepper or pepper flakes, but I put them in anyway and it was worth it. It made it quite spicy, but no sissy boys or girls here.
• Heat the Canola oil in a large wok over medium-high heat. Add the ginger and garlic and stir fry for about 30 seconds or until you can smell it. Add shrimp and cook for about 3-4 minutes. Then finally add the juice mixture and the onions and cook until the shrimp are done and the sauce thickens.

I served the shrimp on a bed of brown rice with a side of peas. Next time, I will keep the rice, but probably make a fresh, fragrant salad in stead.

I think you'll like it. If you don't, call my dad because he's the one who gave me the recipe.

Fillet me

I have developed a skill of cooking fillets that has not received one complaint yet. Except for that one time I dropped the 9 ouncer on the floor, but I had just cleaned the floor with Clorox, so no biggie. Anyway, I learned the technique from my father, Pappie. Take a pan and put about 2 tablespoons of butter. Turn on medium/high heat and let the butter melt and then turn slightly brownish. The part I do a little different comes before. I liberally season the fillets with a lot of cracked black pepper and seasoned salt with a few dashes of Worchesthire Sauce and a bit of A-1. I let the fillets get to room temperature as well. Who knows if that actually helps, but I do it and it seems to work. When the butter is turning brown and bubbling in the pan a little, put the fillets in and let them sear about 3-4 minutes per side for medium rare (depending on the size of course) and 5-6 minutes for medium well. Then let the fillets sit for about 5 minutes after you take them off the heat. The end result will be a nicely seared and crispy outside and a juicy inside. Accompany the fillet with some french fries and spring mix salad with a light dressing.

The dressing is again, from my mom. 2 parts olive oil, 1 part balsamic vinegar. 1 packet of sugar or Splenda. Salt and pepper to taste. Mix liberally. If you like an added kick, add some horseradish and/or dijon mustard.